My dear friend, known here as “The Lamenting Poet,” will be sharing some of his finest work this evening and open to chat in the comments: I'm traveling in Ireland this week.
Broken Fairy Tale
Let me set the record straight: Of course, I understand that stories evolve and change over time.
And they have been adjusted by storytellers to suit the zeitgeist and audiences.
Yet every story has a beginning, and there is an underlying truth that must never be forgotten.
The plundering of time. The story behind the story, so to speak.
Let's start with Rapunzel. No one knows if her hair was beautiful. It was long, but
She always wore her hair in tightly braided, rainbow-colored dreadlocks, and I never saw her with anything else.
Her hair may have been blonde, but it certainly wasn't shiny.
She easily threw him off the balcony so his lover could climb up, it was long enough and then some.
The tower where she lived had a back door that was rarely locked.
Although isolated, she had all the company she could want. I can personally attest to that. She
He had a kind nature and did not tolerate fools, and I can personally attest to that.
The Seven Dwarfs? First, I have to admit that this is a pretty old-fashioned phrase. And
In reality, there were three dwarfs, three midgets, and a short Italian man.
A man named Giacomo with a dissatisfied shoulder. In a contract with the Small People's Union
Equal representation in the workforce – but I don't know how Giacomo got that job.
When Disney got hold of them, their names weren't as country-sounding as he made them out to be.
Their real names were Gussie, Tugboat, Skeeter, Pecker, Barney and Flounder. They loved Snow White.
It was all right, but I didn't want to invite all the woodland animals into my home.
I came down to the cottage to help with the housework, and when I had a beer with Bernie he said to me:
Every time she opened the damn kitchen window, bird droppings would fly all over the house.
Barney also tried to tell me that Skeeter and Pecker were in a relationship, to which I replied, “Love is love.”
So he kept quiet.
Pinocchio, don't talk. First, the part about Geppetto is omitted.
An unpleasant and unpleasant interest in children – that's why he created a wooden doll
First of all, to avoid real children, and secondly, it's not like Pinocchio's nose got longer when he lied.
See what I mean? Some of the local lads were playing with him and trying to get him to talk.
Lie and sneak back with him to the back of the hut. Pinocchio was very popular.
Little Red Riding Hood? Put a present for Grandma in a little basket? No.
Fake Gucci bags, fake Rolexes. She threw some bagels on top of the merchandise.
She was a good girl to hide from the cops while they were on patrol.
She would allow people to earn their money. That's why the wolf was angry with her. She finally
If the bill gets too big, they cut him off. We saw him running through the woods with three of them.
Clinking fake Rolexes on both feet for all to see and hear.
With a clattering sound. Until it was time to pay. He posed. Little Red Riding Hood ran the numbers too.
As a side hustle. It's very entrepreneurial.
Sleeping Beauty is a story that has been reworked over the years. She was indeed asleep.
She had been diagnosed with narcolepsy, which gave Prince Charming necrophilic tendencies and hygiene issues, and he was thrilled when he found her.
I lay there in a gazebo in the woods, thinking I'd won the lottery. I kissed her.
When she woke up, he was so frightened that he ran away like a frightened rabbit.
She ended up marrying a man who owned several parking lots near Miami.
But there were times when he would sleep for days on end. And that didn't change as he grew up. He was a great kid.
But it's not all doom and gloom and the National Enquirer scandal. There was also a lot of happiness.
There are also more practical endings, such as Captain Hook retiring to a very chic
A Manhattan accessory shop that specializes in crocodile leather products. It is still popular today.
A very short season as the captain of Donald's yacht, “Why Pay?”. Hook
He didn't get his pay that day.
Peter Pan has finally grown up and become a choreographer, and Tinker Bell now has the vote.
She is an activist and founded a feminist think tank.
Hubbard, Jack of Jack-in-the-Beanstalk fame, an organic farmer from Iowa.
He was successful and opened a small cafe near Ottumwa for his mother, where she
Special bean brownie confectionery.
After the bad wolf left the house, the three little pigs rebuilt the house and
He founded a construction company that specializes in tiny homes and eco-friendly construction products.
It was quite successful.
Dumbo starts a very profitable aerial videography business. Jiminy Cricket buys a house.
He moved to Vermont and retired to live under the porch of a house.
Yes, it's a mix of stories. I hope I'm not offending any readers by digging a little deeper.
Dig deep into some of our oldest and most cherished stories, but remember, the truth will set you free.
Kitchen Table Kibiting is a Community Series It's for people who, rather than throwing pies at each other, would like to share a virtual kitchen table with other Daily Kos readers. Stop by to chat about music, the weather, the garden, what we made for dinner, etc. If you're new here, you may notice that many of the people posting to this series already know each other to some extent, but we welcome guests to our kitchen table and hope to make some new friends as well.
