In this medical fiction, Hildy's misfit cookies spark a unique friendship with chef Mindy, and a dramatic kitchen showdown forges a bond that goes beyond baking.
This medical novel is one of a collection of stories that feels like a cross between “Final Destination” and “The Monkey's Paw” (W.W. Jacobs, 1902), and is therefore a tragedy that will appeal most to readers who enjoy the relentless allure of a storyline that leads to catastrophe. The technical details surrounding the events are taken from actual cases found in the U.S. Occupational Safety and Health Administration's Accident Reports Database or similar sources, so that, although they may seem outlandish at first glance, they are entirely realistic.
Hildy wasn't a baker like her grandmother, but as a devoted aunt to three middle-school-aged daughters, she was happy to help out where she could. When she baked Jolly Jammer cookies for her daughters' fall school day, she drew ridicule and gossip from the mothers. With strawberry jam oozing from the tiny eye holes and mouths on the surface, the slightly overbaked cookies looked as if they had a bleeding disease, but the kids thought they were the best thing they'd ever had. Hildy's “sick” cookies soon disappeared completely, but most of the platter of more elaborate treats remained untouched.
It was the cookies that brought Hildy and Mindy together. Mindy's chocolate-covered shortbread finger cookies had also disappeared from the plate, but not before Hildy crept over and guiltily ate two. Mindy witnessed her doing so and introduced herself, laughing.
Embarrassed by stealing Mindy's delicious cookies and the fact that her own cookies didn't look all that great, Hildy sheepishly confesses to Mindy that baking isn't her forte. She drops the fact that she runs the hospital's pathology lab and morgue, instead talking about her passion for knife making. Mindy admits that, in fact, she's a chef by trade, but she's terrible at making knives. Mindy manages to add that Baxter, the hospital kitchen boss, is a tyrant, which becomes abundantly clear to Hildy later. By the end of their first conversation, Mindy has promised to give Hildy a cookie tin and described her ideal chef's knife, which Hildy has sketched and explained how to make. The two part as friends, promising to meet again to talk about baking, knives, and old movies.
Mindy's boss, Baxter, was an unhappy, unfulfilled man who enjoyed spreading his own misery. In fact, the only thing that cheered him up was making someone more miserable than himself. The causes of Baxter's gloomy mood were myriad, but the main ones were his hatred of his job, his hatred of his boss, and his annoyance with his staff. He also hated that sports had become too “woke” and that politicians had become too sleazy.
When Baxter graduated from culinary school a few years ago, he had a plan: spend a year working odd jobs to become a junior chef, spend a few years traveling the world working in European kitchens, and then come home in triumph to open his own top restaurant. He imagined his restaurant receiving top acclaim, earning its first Michelin star, then a second, followed by magazine issues. Food and Wine Put his picture on the cover Bon Appetitand was awarded three Michelin stars.
Visualizing a goal may help you achieve it, but the goal will only be achieved with a lot of effort, a lot of help from strangers, and a fair bit of luck.
Unfortunately, Baxter was an angry, sulky, and cynical young man who rarely asked for help from others and tended to be down on his luck. So Baxter's bosses assigned him the most menial and unpleasant tasks and gave the more pleasant kitchen porters choice jobs that would allow them to stand out and be recognized. While a kitchen porter might be tasked with helping to prepare chocolate sauce and basking in its aromatic and delightful flavor, Baxter was tasked with gutting stinky geese, skinning beef kidneys, and scraping carbonized fat from large cast-iron pots.
The stench and grime that permeated Baxter's life put a sullen, dour look on his face and dampened his attitude. He was also a bit of a stinkbuster, with no luck to speak of. Instead of spending years abroad absorbing culture and experiences, visiting French wine regions, working for famous chocolatiers and developing his own fusion recipes, Baxter moved from filthy kitchen to filthy kitchen. The longer he spent at the bottom, the lower his goals became.
This explains why, when Baxter finally got his big break, it wasn't through culinary expertise, but through blackmail. As Baxter was gloomily cleaning pots, he overheard the restaurant's sous-chef bragging on the phone to his girlfriend that he'd stolen one of the restaurant's secret recipes. Baxter gave the sous-chef a few rough hints, and he received a glowing letter of recommendation and an introduction to a bigger kitchen—a hospital kitchen, not a fine-dining restaurant, but still a big step up.
As soon as he had employees, Baxter made their lives miserable. Naturally, management interpreted this as a sign of leadership; they may have thought him a personal jerk, but the fact that he persecuted his employees was seen as a good thing. For the next 30 years, Baxter stayed in the same kitchen, rising through the ranks as those above him were promoted and left.
At 53, with no magazine covers, Michelin stars or writing jobs in sight, Baxter was growing frustrated and focused on growing anger at everyone, especially his boss. The only thing standing in his way of being named head chef was the woman who currently held the position. She was popular, respected and in demand for her affable personality, gregariousness and deep understanding of the various elements of running a hospital kitchen. The fact that she was regularly being offered to head kitchens at bigger, fancier places only made Baxter hate her more. When she appeared on the cover of The New York Times, she was on the cover of The New York Times. Bon Appetit When he received the special commendation from Michelin, his blood boiled and a small blood vessel in his left eye burst.
Meanwhile, Hildy and Mindy found out they worked at the same hospital, and a friendship blossomed between them in the three years since the “bloody zombie cookies” incident at school. Hildy still hadn't gotten better at baking, but her metalworking skills had certainly improved. Mindy owned a beautiful set of handmade knives that Hildy had given her, which she used at work and at home, and kept in a leather roll bag. Mindy's boss's boss, the head chef of the hospital's kitchen, ordered a set of custom knives for himself from Hildy, and then started a tradition of giving his kitchen staff custom knives made by Hildy every year as a reward for their excellent work. At first, the kitchen staff felt a little creepy when they were presented with the highly efficient and extremely sharp knives made by the hospital's pathologist and morgue manager, but that feeling quickly faded as Hildy quickly became a familiar face and the knives were great.
Hildy and Mindy were compatible in many ways, supporting each other. They were both very creative, but Hildy was a linear, detailed thinker, while Mindy was impulsive. Hildy's creativity would produce a new knife over days or weeks, while Mindy's new dishes were a matter of minutes or hours. Hildy's job had its ups and downs, but generally she was her own boss, setting her own routines, and managing the goals and objectives of her pathology work and the morgue. Mindy, on the other hand, had to deal with Baxter. The kitchen work itself was fun and gave her a sense of accomplishment and meaning, and the head chef was inspiring, but Baxter was an evil tyrant.
Whenever the head chef acknowledged Mindy's achievements, Baxter seemed to criticize her or undermine her work. In quarterly evaluations, Baxter called her “outspoken and aggressive” and was quick to pick at her every little mistake. When Mindy misunderstood how he was making red wine sauce, he reprimanded her in front of the entire kitchen staff. He mocked her and asked loudly, “Don't you know? Look, my 10-year-old niece knows. What about your coworker over there, are they stupid like you? Or do they understand at least some of what I say?” Mindy began to cry, which resulted in further mockery and being told she was a “cute girl” but “kind of dumb.” Baxter also regularly changed the menu without notice, forcing Mindy to scramble and make changes and schedule adjustments, or suddenly cancel previous orders, forcing Mindy to abandon half-finished work. This reflected poorly on her performance, but to complain or blame Baxter would only be seen as an excuse for her own incompetence.
On those nights, Hildy would help Mindy out by making the only thing she knew how to make in the kitchen: hot chocolate cocoa with crushed mint and cinnamon, and the two of them would snuggle under a blanket, sip on fragrant hot cocoa and watch old movies.
One Friday afternoon, when most of the kitchen staff were off work until the night shift began, Hildy heard yelling coming from the kitchen next to the lab. Hildy stopped working and tried to resume dictation, but then she clearly heard Mindy's voice change to a shriek. Apparently, Mindy was tired of Baxter's last-minute menu changes and disruption of the kitchen. She wanted to go home earlier than usual, but that plan was ruined. Mindy made an unusually violent remark to Baxter, and Baxter severely criticized her personality and her work, scaring and angering Mindy. So she accused him of being a cruel bully. Baxter sneered and said he didn't want her around anymore. He told her that he knew from the day he met her that she would fail as a chef, that she was just a stupid woman, and that she should pack her things, quit, and find another job.
Mindy screamed and pushed at his chest with both hands. Baxter raised his fist near her face, making her flinch. Hildy ran from the lab to the kitchen, where she saw the large man's back, fist raised, ready to hit Mindy. She reacted instinctively and kicked him hard in the back. Baxter roared in rage, stumbled to regain his balance, spun around and lunged at Hildy. Hildy reacted instinctively and delivered a powerful kick to his lower abdomen. Baxter's momentum caused him to fall on top of Hildy, pinning her down under his weight. Hildy, anticipating a further blow, wriggled out from under him.
Mindy grabbed Hildy's hand and pulled her to her side. They stood close, holding each other's hands, and watched as Baxter rose to his feet and attacked them. Baxter lay still for what felt like a lifetime, but after barely a minute Hildy was close and expertly rolled him over. She then saw that her large Mayo dissection scissors were stuck up to the hilt in his chest. Hildy didn't remember leaving the morgue with the scissors in her hands, but the fluorescent pink handles of the custom-made scissors were clearly visible and recognizable.
It didn't take long for Mindy and Hildy to decide on a course of action, nor did it take long for Baxter's body to be loaded onto a scoop stretcher, onto a mortuary trolley, and then onto a trolley. Mindy then called the head chef in tears to tell him that she had had a huge fight with Baxter and that he had walked out yelling that he was quitting. The chef calmed Mindy down and gave instructions to finalize the menu for the next day, confirmed that the evening's orders had been placed, special orders had been placed in the order box, and that Baxter had clocked out.
By midnight, the kitchen was cleared, Baxter was off duty and taken off the roster, his head was frozen and sent to the medical school for anatomy classes, Hildy had his organs packed and ready to send to pathology school, and the rest of his body was placed in a lined cardboard box and sent to the crematorium.
That night was double chocolate cocoa and rum night, and after a long hot shower, Hildy and Mindy cuddled up on the couch, sipping drinks and watching old romantic movies until they fell asleep together.
